Mid-week moment for Bank of America

Now maybe its my fault for not realizing long ago, since the name is Bank of AMERICA, that ol BoA actually hates the rest of the world, so much so, that they will try to not let you spend your own money there. A few of you have heard of my trials with BoA over the last three years, which after each time, I have sat them down and tried to see how we can resolve things for the future so that I can actually access my own money. Here are a few of the conversations we've had:

-Me: I'm trying to access money and my ATM card is not working. BoA: Yes, we noticed that you were trying to withdraw money in South America so we shut off your card. Me: Yes, I work in South America, as we've discussed, so I need to be able to withdraw money here.

-Me: I'm trying to access money in X Casino and my ATM card is not working. BoA: Yes, we noticed someone trying to access money in a casino so we shut your card off. Me: Yes, thats ME! I didn't realize I needed your permission for gambling.

-Me: I'm trying to access money in Venice and my card is not working. BoA: Yes, we noticed many prosecco and risotto transactions so we shut off your card. Me: Yes, I'm on vacation in Italy, am I not allowed prosecco?

Now, while I appreciate the idea of BoA's vigilance, I've repeatedly asked for them to stop it. I can look out for myself without big brother BoA helping me out.

But now they have decided that I will not get a car today - with my own money - because I don't have a U.S. mobile phone number for them to text me a Safe Pass code. When I inquired whether they could maybe email this code to me or do a transfer over the phone, they first asked me if I had informed the person that I was transfering money to that the transfer would be coming through. Yes I informed myself, well informed. They then informed me that they could only do that if I was in the U.S. What? Why would I need to transfer myself money if I was in the U.S.?

I should also mention, that I first went along with their whole Safe Pass text system, and actually walked my Mom through receiving a text on her phone in order to play BoA's game. Well wouldn't you know it, they canceled that transaction because their system went down. Maybe this is BoA's way of teaching my Mom to text. They aren't satisfied with just parenting me, now they're after my Mom.

Moral of the story - BoA, when I do get back to AMERICA, I'm becoming an emanicpated minor.