Africa, shaken straight up with salt

This is Africa - I know this looks photoshopped in so many ways, just like Africa to do that

This post was going to be called, 'I can spy if I want to' due to the amount of SIM cards, currencies, visas, adapters now in my possession. With Africa on spin dial (plus living in Europe with US contraptions) I still get confused, so I've created a compartment for each country - see anal later on, better known as my newfound survival 

Christmas presents - check! Just one half of my box filled with the toiletries I get on every flight. Anyone need some socks, a mask, toothpaste, lipgloss? Not pictured here, my many pairs of Aladdin inspired jammies - oh business class, I know I poo pooed you as a waste of money not long ago, but who can solve hunger if they don't have a magic carpet and fresh breath after a 12 hour flight?

Sweet Salone - wasn't sure I'd ever be back and yet when I went, even sans Lidia there to guide me, it still felt like home. I can't describe the bizzaroville feeling of landing in Sierra Leone and feeling right at home, with a group of friends to call

Salone, Lebanese party style - I've talked before about how proliferate the Lebanese are in SL. Well this time without Lidia there to guide me, I counted on the Lebanese to host me, and what better decision to make than a people that are born to host. In my week there we planned a new business (obvi) for them to open called 'Nostalgia', a cafe with real coffee and baked goods from every country's home - coming soon to Freetown!!!

There's a lot of surreal moments these days - but leaving Freetown in a UN helicopter is pretty high up there. I'm still waiting for the pics with me steering with earmuffs on, coming soon. Thank you again Lebanon (or my Lebanese friend who works security for the UN) for hooking me up and sending me out on top of the world

Malawi - has their head on straight, unfortunately no one seems to be working to put this saying to work

Finally! Traveling in Africa with someone else! Ana my Croatian colleague and I enjoying Lake Malawi, while looking on our honeymoon

Hiking to the top of Zomba Plateau, Malawi, also known as Queen Elizabeth point

Looking skeptical on displayed cooking technologies - where's the Easybake oven?!!!

Truer words were never written on the back of a truck

Fav new band, just wish I had Follow the Mad tshirts to give them. If you're dying for Who Let the Dogs Out, these are your people - donation 1 dollar

Getting around Malawi isn't easy if you don't own a car. But as I've learned, adopting a taxi driver smooths those bumpy roads. Here's Steve, who drove us for two days (4 hours each) and is studying in England to be a paramedic, but came home to Malawi to build himself a beach house. Best parts about Steve - you never have to guess where he's studying because he only wears Tshirts with England or the British flag; he gets both worlds and one day when the car died and it was dead of night, he disappeared to come back with four dudes in the middle of nowhere who rolled the car backward and he jumped it and I was so impressed and he laughed and said - this is Africa; and the best part about Steve is he loves Shania Twain. When I asked him if he would take a picture with us after 10 hours and two days together, he made me promise I wouldn't put it on Facebook. 

I've decided to stop apologising for not posting, you get it by now - I'm busy and/or uninspired with my life. It's not that I don't miss you or my little sojourn with myself that is this blog

Africa roulette - It's hard to believe that it was just a year ago that I had never been to 'real' Africa (minus Tunisia the year before) and that I was told I was worth 20 cows by a friendly driver/turned into suitor. Remember when I said that no one would hire me for jobs in Africa because I had no experience in Africa - well it's sort of like bartending. No one will hire you without experience until they don't want to go to Sierra Leone (aka the Monday day shift). And as with bartending I went from the Monday dayshift to being thrown into Friday/Saturday nights with World Series playoff Redsox/Yankees games, upon which I woke up and thought my life is speeding in a direction out of control where I'm only awake from 2pm to 4am and my only nights off are Sundays and Mondays when no one else is available. I started to hate crowds, crave sunlight and intellectual talk. Traveling to Africa every two weeks to a different country is about the same. I find it hard to keep up/do the things I used to/talk to the people I want to because I'm constantly unpacking/debriefing and repacking/preparing and I crave tap water, boredom, and the ability to actually put my suitcase away.  Be careful what you wish for, so they say

This is Africa - TIA is a term thrown about when all goes wrong or 'we' (no not the Royal we, but the UN we, basically the same) can't figure out how something could seem so clear to us and yet not be working - aka visitors trying to make sense of things and failing. I remember when Lidia used to say it or when I landed in Sierra Leone and thought, no it's derogatory  - and no it doesn't have to be this hard, she's just tired or hasn't figured out another way to do things. Well flash forward and I take it all back. After managing two projects now in Africa, which both include coordinating 12 Ministries of the government - you will do things you never thought you would or swore you wouldn't/weren't necessary. Not sure what I mean? Well based on my experience (though still limited) you will not get anyone at your meeting even if they say they're going to be there and it's in their benefit unless a) you deliver an official invitation letter personally (because if not it may never actually arrive); b) you call each person YOURSELF and remind them twice that they said they were coming; c) you pay some sort of transport fee or at least provide lots of food. Just to be clear, this is not an OR situation. And yes you may be thinking - well you could delegate all of that, and yes I have gotten cocky and thought so myself - and then no one showed up. I still can't totally explain it, whether it's that when you call/invite people personally you develop a relationship and they feel that they owe you to show up in the end or whether it's the tasty snacks I've chosen; but it means doing two/three/four jobs at once - administration, coordination, caterer/hostess, and technical content. And now I know how Lidia got exhausted and just how important it is that your snacks are in fact tasty

Lions, and tigers, and bears, ho hum - I didn't realize it until my most recent trip to Malawi where my colleague Ana who is from Croatia and had never been to Africa (not even fake Africa in Tunisia) that Africa has become normal for me. At every turn she was ooohing and ahhhing about the scenery and the adorable babies and the frolicking baboons - and at one point I thought why I am not feeling this? And I realized that now when I go to Africa, it's like going to the office - I'm busy thinking about all the work there is to do and how to make things work and I've realized I need to /deserve to take more time to appreciate it every time and not let work eat up my appreciation for the life around me and to engage with it. After all, if it's not at least offering me it's glory/humbling me to my knees - why in the world (Africa) am I making myself dizzy traveling back and forth? On my most recent trip, on our weekend we headed to a mountain plateau and climbed to the tallest peak with views for miles and miles; and then went to Lake Malawi (imagine the Great Lakes, it seems like a sea it's so huge) and yet I wasn't able to totally disconnect from work and while Ana was ooohing and aahhing and making friends with child bands (named West Life Band, and yes they did a mean cover of "Who Let the Dogs Out" and an original tune named, "Hello, How are You?" all played on empty plastic bins and fishing wires, with their top age being 8), I was typing away and nodding and waving her on. And in that sense I was missing the point - just like needing to taste the margaritas at Cactus Club in order to sell them, without taking in the splendor of Africa it is much harder to find the inspiration to work for Africa. (ok that's the end of the deep stuff)

Traveling on speed - When I told a colleague who asked why I never post stories or pictures from my travels on Facebook, that I had a blog, she immediately assumed it was a travel blog full of tips. I quickly corrected her that it was more of an online diary of funny (at least to me) stories of my travels and tribulations. So I'm sorry that I haven't given you tips on the best restaurants, even though I did tell you about the keyhole. I will take a rare moment and share with you some of my traveling stand-bys; while telling you that I still always forget something on every trip, so take these tips like you would a margarita - with a bit of salt.

1) What were you thinking wearing a belt while traveling? Find a pair of pants that doesn't need a belt and those are your travel/airport pants. Seriously, if you're in front of me in security taking up time to take off/put on your belt - I hope your seat is next to the bathroom
2)  Packing cubes - It may sound anal and you all know how I do love spreasheets, but seriously Alli Beall, you changed my life (in more ways than one but let's stick with the packing cubes for now). The ability to compartmentalize your travel attire when you're living out of a suitcase is huge. Oh that's my work clothes cube, and there's my 'I'm still thrilled by baboons cube', not to be confused by the 'dirty laundry cube' that saves you from embarrassing moments of airport security going through your dirty underwear.
3) A headlamp - I don't care if you're never leaving the states or you're the cousin of Edison - get a headlamp. It has saved my life countless times, and when I say life I mean getting to finish 50 shades of grey while respectfully letting Courtney sleep in the bed next to me.
4) Always wear a suit jacket while traveling - I don't care if you have a nightgown (nightwear for daywear) underneath, a suit jacket makes you business class (synonym = poised to demand an upgrade) with one item and saves you from folding/wrinkling/packing one more item. And there's nothing more satisfying than handing your suit jacket to the flight attendant to keep unwrinkled with a wink or a stern glare (u choose, you're business class after all!), while you slumber away in the sweats you wore under it.
5) Checking a bag is for amateurs - Please see wearing a belt and packing cubes above. Unless you're moving to another country or bringing gifts/food/perfume to satisfy your huge family/solve hunger/stamp out BO, you never need to check a bag - I promise. First of all, most of you reading this don't take trips of longer than 3 weeks tops, and second know that any country you're going to (other than Sierra Leone) has shops where you can buy whatever you forgot (except see headlamp above), and in the countries where you can't, all the better to live like a local and buy those sandals made of tires or dress yourself in the sheer joy that you're only schlepping a carry on.

And so as I continue to try and figure out how to have a real life in Rome, take in the splendor of Africa, keep connected with the US, and still get paid - I've decided to focus on my key tenets: 1) be kind; 2) speak plainly, directly, and honestly; 3) remember someone always has bigger problems and better jewelry 4) it's not that you fall but how you get up (without showing your underwear); and 5) wear stripes - and the rest will figure itself out - hopefully - at least there's still hope